My little brother bought two dairy
milk while coming from the tuition classes (for the first time). Till now he
always bought only one dairy milk and never shared with me, rather teased me by
showing the rapper. I was shocked of how it happened and so I asked. He said,”today
is 20th 2012 so don’t know whether we will get a chance to have
another dairy milk ever! “. My mom was working in the kitchen at that time.
After hearing to my brother she started laughing but I didn’t as I know
laughing on it was like praising his humor which I can’t do...:p
Looking
at the beautiful sunset of 20th dec I was not so happy because my life was not
so generous with me , I was thinking life only as a bullshit. At some corner of
my heart I was waiting for the end of world on 21st dec . I didn't have the courage to kill myself and so I was waiting for the death caused by Mother
Nature. Whenever we talk about the end of world my grandma used to scold us and
stop us from speaking evil things. I always thought these things as exaggerated
and superstitious.
After many days we were having
dinner together as everyone is always busy in their hectic schedule all time.
We again started discussing about the world end, facts ,scientific data
supporting and opposing it. Though many things
were proved it wrong , I was in no mood to believe that there was no world end
on 21st dec . I was not involved so much in conversation that day.
As always said human determine their goal or start to do something good only at
verge of its end so did my family was planning. My mom and dad started planning
for the next day morning walk (which was their first morning walk) yes of
course if the world doesn't end. It was fun! Enjoying the conversation all time
but still somewhere, some different thought were emerging in my mind. My mind
was filled with my problems. Someone had rightly said, live the present and
enjoy every present moment. Never to lose it worrying about future.
After supper we were watching the
daily soaps. I was buried deep in my thought sitting and watching my favorite
channel, murmuring. I hated everything around me on that day rather from many
days before. There were sound intuition telling
that ‘ world is going to END ‘, but what if it doesn't ? And what if it
does? No answers to it but there were no end to questions. I were to my
bedroom, checked my cell (most important work of the day and most frequently
done!)as usual there were few messages from friends some saying,” whts up?” but I didn't took efforts to reply them as I
always thought it was not so important as more important at that time was to
think than to chat with them. I always
took my friends as granted which I shouldn't have but I did. I was addicted to
thinking silently where I could be myself, buried deep in my thoughts , far
from influence of world ( but still under pressure of it) . I felt asleep after some time.
In the morning after keeping the
alarm on snooze for five or more times I woke up. I was not happy realizing that
I was still alive! There was silence around me. I thought mom and dad finally
brought their plan in action. I came to balcony expecting that the smell of
fresh air somehow will make my day a little better. But I was stunned seeing
the picture outside, shocked like never before. All buildings, all houses
including mine was damaged very badly. Our flat was a little better, may be
because it was on the ground floor. I never saw such destruction in my whole
life. I was completely blank for an hour almost. Not able to understand what
really happened. Was it an Earthquake?
Then where are the injured people, died people, ambulance? There was nothing as
far as I could see. And how I was alive and so fine after such big destruction.
There was no any noise, no crying, and no sound at all. It was like the whole
world was playing hide and seek with me. Only silence everywhere. I could not
find a single human in an hour. I was scared very much, I shouted at the peak
of my voice. I cried like never before. I was searching for people, my family,
any stranger. I wanted someone to be with me. I ran to my bedroom as fast as I could,
took my mobile. Tried to call the first number in my phone-book I didn’t even
saw whose number was that. There was no network coverage on phone as it was
quite obvious after such a big destruction. I ran out of my house with fastest
speed. I came very far searching for people. When it was impossible for me to
walk further I sat on the stairs of a shop nearby. I was still unable to find
out anything. “Is this a world end”’ I thought to myself. Then how I was alive?
I was a part of the world then how could I survive? Or its that I died and this
was the life after death. Again questions and no answers.
I always loved silence but at that
time that silence was killing me. I remembered all those moments when I took
everything for granted, friends to whom I didn’t replied last night, that fun
conversation with my family I tried to avoid, those fights with my brother. I
wish I could die at that moment but I didn’t had any means to kill myself. The
trains were not running. I didn’t had sleeping pills, no any rope… nothing! I
shouted again….cried cried a lot. I prayed God to bring the world back or to
bring me back to the world. I promised Him that I will never take anything for
granted. I will value everything and everyone around me.” I will never complain
about anything but please bring the world back”. I was having my mobile with
me, I played the song,” teri hai jamee tera aasma”..To feel better, to acquire strength
for fighting against that evil act. I closed my eyes and again started praying
and suddenly I heard voice of my mother saying,” Wake up now its 8 already”. I
woke up… with a sigh of relief. The same song I played in dream was running on
the radio. I realized it was a dream, I became really happy, happy like never
before. I decided to keep all the promises I gave to Him in that nightmare. I
went near my mother, gave her a tight hug, without speaking a single world,
with sigh of relief and ‘real’ smile on my face…..:)
